Curiosity Core: Who are you? What is that?
Wheatley: Weren't you incinerated in the first Portal game?
(Fourth wall cracks)
Mochlum: Your entire life is a mathmatical error. I am about to fix it.
GLaDOS: Not again! You monster! Shut up!
[Insert sparta remix video here]
Fact Core: Sparta is a Greek city.
Adventure Core: QUICK, WHAT'S THE SITUATION?
Space Core: SPAAAAAAAAAACE!
Mochlum: You are from space? I have a friend in space! He in danger! WE MUST HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELP THEM!
Space Core: We're going to space? We are!? OMAIGODOMAIGODOMAIGODOMAIGODOMAIGODOMAIGODOMAIGODOMAIGOD!!!!
Mochlum: They left MAGICAL CLUES of where they are in 3 different spots! They are.... the Death Star, the Dusty Dune Galaxy, and Aperture Science labs! WEEEEEEE! LET'S GO!
(Everyone builds a rocket and gathers supplies)
Mochlum: WE FINISHED! NOW LET'S GO TO SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE, SPAAAAAAAAAAAAACE CORES!
Tornadospeed: WHAT HE SAID
(Rocket blasts off)
The Death StarEdit
Space Core: I'M IN SPAAACE!!!
Tornadospeed: Yes, yes you are. WHERE TO FIRST, CAPTAIN MOCHLUM?
Mochlum: THE DEATH STAR! IN PRINCESS LEIA'S CELL!
(at the Death Star)
Stormtrooper: WHO ARE YOU?
Mochlum: WE are.... um.... SHPOCK!
Stormtrooper: NOOOO ITS THE COMPETITION GET THEM!
Space Core: HURRY INTO THE DEATH STAR! (everyone runs in)
Princess Leia: I hope somebody saves me!
Mochlum: (runs in)
Space Core: WHERE IS THE CLUE?
Stormtrooper: HAULT! WHO ARE YOU?
Anger Core: BLAUALKGSUALGUSADGKJDADJKDBALBKJALLLLUAUABULBAUABLAUG (continues growling)
Princess Leia: Aren't you here to rescue me?
Space Core: FOUND THE CLUE1
Princess Leia: No? T_T
Mochlum: YEP! TROLOLO!
Mochlum: The clue is...
Space Core: (reads) I AM AT A TACO PLACE, WHERE THE EATERS HAVE BIG FACES!
Mochlum; It is probably-
Space Core: DON'T SAY, IT WILL SPOIL THE END OF THE EPISODE!
Mochlum: NEXT PLACE IS THE DUSTY DUNE GALAXY!
(everyone gets in the ship and flys away)
Dusty Dune GalaxyEdit
Mochlum: TIME FOR WHAT CHUGGACONROY CALLS "Extremely monotonous levels".
Space Core: WHERE IS TEH CLUE???????????????????
Mochlum: (sinks in sand 20 times) I FOUND ONE! IT SAYS....
It is often combined with KFC, and don't stop here if you want to pee.
Mochlum; It still probably is...
Space Core: STOP TEH SPOILERS!!!! WHERE IS TEH NEXT CLUE?
Mochlum: Aperture Labs...
Space Core: OOOOKAAAAAY!
Adventure Core: Really? That was quick! (sinks in quicksand)
(everyone gets in the ship)
Aperture Science LaboratoriesEdit
Logic Core: One 18.25 ounce package Chocolate Cake Mix.
Tornadospeed: Yes, I think we established that.
Tornadospeed: Everyone get a portal gun to help us navigate! Excluding the cores, who can't hold them.
Mochlum: 8D (puts the Fact Core in an infinite loop)
Tornadospeed: LETS GOOO!
Wheatley: But she'll see us if we go through the chambers!
Tornadospeed: Good point. EVERYONE UP THIS DELIVERY VENT! (climbs into it)
(Everyone climbs into it)
Curiosity Core: WEEEEEEEEEE!
(Vent Breaks) (Everyone falls out onto a dark catwalk)
Adventure Core: Aww great.
Wheatley: (turns on flashlight) They told me that if I ever used this flashlight, I would die! Why would they give me this stuff if they didn't want me to use them? I mean seriously!
Mochlum: Well I can use it. (uses it) I FOUND THE FINAL CLUE!
GLaDOS: (grabs clue with mechanical arm) I'LL TAKE THAT.
Tornadospeed: (uses portals to get to GLaDOS' chamber)
GLaDOS: BWAHAHA, YOU'LL NEVER GET THIS... WHATEVER IT IS!
Mochlum: WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS???
GLaDOS: Well duh. I'm evil. NOW YOU ALL MUST PERISH!
Turrets: (shoots at everyone)
Mochlum: (dodges bullets... in a cliched Matrix style)
Tornadospeed: (uses portals to redirect bullets back to the turrets)
Turrets: Ouch... no hard feelings... I don't blame you... (dies)
GLaDOS: I'm not finished with you yet. (summons rocket sentrys)
Rocket Sentrys: (locks on to us and fires rockets)
Space Core: EVERYBODY RUN!
Wheatley: I HAVE AN IDEA! SEND ME INTO AN INFINITE LOOP!
Tornadospeed: (puts Wheatley into an infinite loop)
Wheatley: NOW SHOOT THE ORANGE PORTAL OVER THERE!
Tornadospeed: (does so)
(Wheatley flys out the orange portal and lands on a button)
GLaDOS: NO! WHAT ARE YOU doooiiiinnnngg. (shuts down)
Rocket Sentrys: (shuts down)
Mochlum: Now where's that clue... Ah, there ya are! (takes clue)
Clue: I am where the bell rings-
Mochlum: It must be-
Fact Core: STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT IS TACO BELL!
Mochlum: THAT IS WHAT I WAS GONNA SAY!
Space Core: NO!
Wheatley: So Mochlum's friend is at Taco Bell? Here is a cake portkey to Taco Bell!
Mochlum: (takes it) IT'S A LIE! IT TOOK ME TO KFC! And it tastes pretty good.
Adventure Core: Was it by a Taco Bell?
Mochlum: Well of course-
Space Core: IDIOT! (everyone takes cake portkey to KFC by Taco Bell)
Meap: YOU SAVED ME FROM THIS HORRIBLE TACO PLACE!
Mochlum: YOUR WELCOME!
Space Core: So is this episode over?
Mochlum: I guess. This was the best adventure ever.
Space Core: I highly doubt that.